So…I know this post might be controversial to some parents. Yet it will also feel like validation and relief to others. I once took a class on Technology and Children for parents. And the teacher confirmed that it’s helpful to work with and not to fight technology. Technology (like time) marches on. Therefore, let’s explore how to embrace screen time without the mom guilt!
Just to be clear: Expert opinion on the exact number of screen time hours ranges. Some have even acknowledged that the number of hours is going to depend on individual factors.
Here is a basic breakdown from the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry:
- 18 months of age and younger: No TV and only screen chatting with a friend/family member.
- 18-24 months-Limit TV to only educational programming with a caregiver.
- 2-5 years: Limit 1 hour of “non educational” programs on weekdays and 3 hours on weekends.
- 6 years and up: Encourage healthy habits and limit activities that include screens.
2 Reasons Why Screen Time is a Problem
There are two main reasons screens such as TV and computers (tablets & phones included) are a problem. These reasons haven’t changed much since I was a kid.
The first reason is it isn’t healthy to sit all day. Office workers know the detrimental effects of sitting all day. Not moving while in front of a computer screen is unhealthy. It’s important to get our bodies moving as much as possible throughout the day. Kids are no longer outside playing as they were generations past. Daily activities I did as a kid included: Bike riding, walks in the neighborhood, swimming and playing in backyards. This is sadly not as common today.
A second reason screen time could be problematic is because kids need real life socialization. And this doesn’t include talking online conversations. If they aren’t socializing, kids will not know how to properly communicate. A whopping 55 percent of communication is non verbal according to a study. Kids will not be able to learn subtle non verbal cues if they don’t get practice.
Learn How To Embrace Screen Time Without Mom Guilt
First off, let’s start by saying every parent lets their child watch a screen. At least sometimes.
I remember talking to a friend when I was pregnant. He said that kids nowadays can navigate phones better than him.
My response was, “Oh no. I’m not going to let my kid near a screen.”
Lol.
And he countered with “Oh no. Everyone does it. Trust me. You’ll have to. It’s just a matter of how much”.
Needless to say, yes, I do let my 3 year old watch TV.
However, I do my best to make sure she watches educational programs. Occasionally I will let her watch her favorite cartoon. And she also plays educational video games on the iPad.
I know I’m not alone in using screen time with my toddler. I’ve heard this discussion from parents both in person and on online forums. Many feel guilty about their kids’ screen time.
That being said, I don’t believe we should feel guilty about giving our kids screen time For one thing, we all have a lot on our plate. The 2020 pandemic brought more time at home with less child care options. We are making our way out of that.
Therefore, Youtube characters such as Ms. Rachel became our occasional “parent partners”. And that’s okay.
As a single mom, I’ve had my child listen to the nightly bedtime story read on Youtube when I’m exhausted.
I don’t believe TV and educational videos are bad. It’s all about how you use it and how aware you are.
Ideas on How To Work with Screen Time
I am aware that sometimes I’m going to exceed the recommended screen time.
However, I make every effort to get my child up and moving throughout the day.
Further, I do my best to socialize her in this emerging post pandemic world.
Awareness if key.
Here are some ideas on how to work with screen time:
- Play educational video games with your kids. It’s important to see what they are doing. You can help guide them and show them how to play. You’ll be surprised at their progress!
- Watch TV shows/movies with them. This can help you make sure it’s educational and high quality. The best shows are ones which are interactive. And you can interact as well.
- Work out/yoga and dance videos are awesome! My toddler loves to dance with me or to do some yoga. And it’s a great break not only for her but for me as well.
- Kids Music Videos are a source of music. I now know most of the kid’s songs. And I love to sing along with my child. I try to expose to her other genres of music. But I know kids songs are an important part of her verbal (and social) development.
Be Aware: Internet Safety and other Tips
Be aware of the dangers of the internet. Kids can be exposed to predators, bullying, pornography, etc.
It’s important to always know who your kids talk to online. Bear in mind the pitfalls of your teens on social media. Take measures to protect them.
Similarly, it’s important to know what they are watching. In particular, it’s a good idea to use all the parental controls.
One good idea is to charge kids’ phones in the parent’s room at night. This helps ensure they aren’t tempted by their phone at night. To get a proper night’s rest screens should be turned off 30 minutes before bedtime.
Another good idea is to turn off screens during mealtimes. This will encourage table talk amongst family and friends. It’s important to have a distraction less meal and pleasant social conversation daily.
Helpful Tip: I cover the cameras with stickers on all devices to ensure there are no accidental pictures or videos.
We are living In a Golden Age of Technology/Info
Some of the smartest kids/young adults I’ve known were self admitted TV addicts. However, I’m sure they also read plenty of books as well. And the programs they watched tended to be documentaries.
Balance is key after all.
We are living in a golden age of technology and information. With that said, information and technology will only grow as time passes. How much information our kids will have access to should be embraced. When I was a kid, I literally got my information from my mom’s dusty encyclopedia set.
And so I embrace the fact that my child will have so much information at her fingertips as she grows up…
I also embrace all the Why questions I expect to get from her. Instead of “I don’t know” we can now say “Hold on, let me google it”.
As always, Remember 2 Savor this moment in time. We’ll be living like the Jetsons before we know it.
